How an Accident was an Act of God.......I Believe in Miracles!

I have two people in my life I love dearly, but constantly butt heads together..........Rosie and Johnathan (my fiance). Both of them are stubborn and have a had time realizing that understanding each other, is not the same a necessary agreeing with one another. Both feel that it's the other person responsibility.

Sunday, I had ENOUGH! I seriously wanted to knock their head together. I told them so. They need to work this out amongst themselves are I was done.

Johnathan got angry, Rosie was angry, and I was angry. Johnathan and I talked for a minute and got nowhere, except hurt me more. I grabbed the kids and headed of to to Grandma's house, to give us a break.

Be careful how you pray. I was so upset I asked God to help Johnathan have a change of heart. I prayed that he would realize that he missed us and that he would come over to Grandma's and ask us back, or at least call.

After words I called my soon to be sister-in-law and she asked me to come over. I decided to do that and turned up the next street I could. I headed back home, to visit with Laurie. I was pretty much the only vehicle on the street, being that is was Sunday afternoon about 2:00 p.m. I noticed a vehicle a stop sign, but since I didn't have a sign, I kept going.

I was driving approximately 35 mph. Next thing I know I was hit. This girl hit the corner of the front passenger side of the van. It's a pretty bad hit, she totalled both vehicles. I have pictures, I'll post them when I get the adapter I left at work.

Act of God?

My daughter Rosie usually is sitting upfront with me, seat belt on of course! Her side of the van was were most the impact was. That door had been pushed in so hard, it is against the seat. This Sunday though, Sabrina (for the first time) figured out how to unbuckle all her car seat straps. Rosie, for some reason, went back to strap her in. She had finished the last strap, just as we go hit.

All the girls appear to be okay. Sabrina received a small abrasion on her ear. Olivia shows no injuries at this time. RoseMarie has started complaining about her back hurting and she has a small bruise on her back.

I got the worst of it, but so far I managing with the medications I am on. I have severe whip lash, goose egg on my noggin, bruised legs and a pretty big bruise one of the arms.

So how is this a positive thing in my life?

My daughter listened to the Holy Ghost feeling that directed her into the backseat. My testimony has grown through this accident. I know that God takes care of us. By the grace of God, my children are alive and so am I!

Johnathan realized that he wants to be a part of our family, and he doesn't want us to leave. He is far from being perfect, but he has started on meeting us half way!

Life is all about learning, when we refuse to learn, we might as well die.

If this seems written a little loopy, sorry, but I am a little loopy.

Oh, I also won some Jazz tickets and through my pain managed to go to the Jazz game earlier this evening. Jazz lost by one point :(. I took Johnathan, Rosie, Randy and my Grandparents. It was a new thing for both Randy and Rosie. My Grandparents are pretty big fans of the Jazz and enjoyed it. I enjoyed what I didn't doze though, and Johnathan was glad to be with me. (He's not huge on the sport thing)

So yes, this is my FOURTH accident this year. Third totalled cars! I am about ready to quit driving! At least only ONE of the accidents were my fault.

Till the next time--------

Kitties

I am so proud of my Rosemarie! I left her in charge of the twins early Saturday morning. I went to a fabulous class about how to make myself more marketable from the employer's point of view. Sometime during this time, Rosie discovered our cat "Kitty", was giving birth! Rosie couldn't find anybody at home, however she was smart enough to get on Facebook, and get a hold of my sister, Josie. She took the suggestions and when I got home, we had four beautiful kitty-cats!

She is soooooooo smart and resourceful!

Face it I live in the real world!

I know there are some of you mothers out there, that have the "magazine" look to their houses, children, husbands, cars and what not. More power to you, but I live in the real world.

I like to escape for a minute and open a magazine, look at the air brushed people (I hope that's true, if not don't burst my bubble), the cars with shiny paint, perfectly clean and dressed children, playing nicely.......you know those pictures.

Then I hear a crash! Welcome to MY world....

My legs hurt so bad I can barely walk, when I do my hips are sore, my hair needs a cut about 6 months ago, a few highlights too (hides the grey), my hips could stand to loose a few pounds, my nails need to be filled.........

Sabrina has stripped down to nothing but her diaper, and is hunting for either a pair of my heels I can't wear or some dress to wear. She loves to layer her clothes with as many dresses as she can get off the hangers......Olivia senses the need to overturn every item in her bedroom, I still haven't decided what she looking for.......Rosie is making something in the kitchen, what? it doesn't matter. All I know its guaranteed to make a mess and cause arguments while she has do everything.

My $50 couch and arm chair is still outside covered with a top, poor Johnathan has been too tired after to bring it up.....my table is outside on my porch waiting to be put together.....my kids eat their mini pizza meal on a small kiddie table I have.......on my pink carpet......in the living room.

I have almost no spoons because we're teaching the twins to put their dishes in the sink, and the think we mean the garbage. Plates I can see, but always forget to dig the spoon out. My cupboards a mess, no one ares if a spend a day organizing them, they like scavenger hunt in the kitchen I guess.

My shower curtains torn, I bought a new one and I can't open the rings, my hands hurt too bad.

So while my life on the out skirts looks like its in shambles.......

I get home from work and am greeted by my girls with showers of hugs and kisses. I make an easy meal, let the dishes soak, and snuggle with the girls to watch Hanna Montana or Suite Life. I watch Sabrina model every dress she has, and then find out I have to wash them because she also found a chocolate bar!

My girls, my house, may not be perfect, but they both make me happy.

Matthew

Matthew is almost 10 years old. He and Rosie shared the same due date, Jan. 5th. He came about a week early. He is the only child I could actually say I laughed out, and there were plenty of witnesses that could testify to that.

When Matthew was born, he looked like a serious old man. He'd wrinkle up his forehead and stare intensely at things. He was bald on top, but had a ring of hair. He was a cute baby and survived his sister's attempts to "hide" him.

Matthew is a quiet, creative child. He loves to make all sorts of experiments! I haven't figured out why, but when I was on bed rest with the twins, he decided to see how many water bottles he could fill with pee. I found out about that one, thanks to ladies in the ward coming out to help clean house.

How many water bottles CAN Matthew fill with pee? 12, until busted by mom........

Matthew loves video games. Thanks to his father he is able to get really good at them. He also enjoys to go fishing and camping with family and friends. He likes Monster Trucks and racing. He enjoys crash-up Derby's.

He is my little man. I miss seeing him sometimes, since he lives with his dad, but he is turning into such a gentleman.

A couple of years ago, Matthew gave the biggest Mother's day card. It read: I love you so much Mommy, even if you do hurt me sometimes. I was shocked, a little embarrassed, but it was cute.

I shouldn't beat my kids, but its out of habit. At least I stopped using chairs.........

He tried making a snack by himself in kindergarten. He put oatmeal in the microwave and cooked it for about 10 min. He forgot to put water in it........ Since then he's stuck with P&J sandwiches and has never had issues.

(I truly don't beat my kids, I promise.)

Tagged By Dunhaven

I've been tagged by a new blogger friend Heidi. She said either one, so I'm picking weird unknown facts..........I think I needed to do 7 or 8.

I do 8, and my brain is a little mushed today, so bare with me.

1. I got to pick my own name when I was a preschooler. I had way cool hippie parents that called me hey kid, until then! (Just kidding) They were cool, but I had a name, it was Kelley and everyone thought I was a boy. So instead I picked a name that now I have to spell time and time again, nobody can say it right, but they always remember.

2. People thought I was a boy when I was younger. I am not a girly-girl. I don't wear makeup, seldom brush my hair, and could care less about designer labels. When I was a kid, I couldn't stand my hair touching my ears. I hated it! Kind of funny, because I have incredibly long hair now.

3. I am a shoe alcoholic! I have about 100 pairs of shoes and I can't stop collecting them. The sad thing is I can't wear most of them, because I am not suppose to wear heels. I love them, and my daughter (1 & 1/2 sizes behind me) is eagerly casing out her assumed inheritance!

4. I am a great cook, when I want to be. I don't like the time involvement. The more time it takes the grouchier I get. I hate baking. I actually walk away from cooking, not even wanting to eat. I am so dreading this Thanksgiving.........

5. I love to host parties. I tend to go overboard, but my kids think I throw the best Easter, 24th of July, and Halloween parties. (This is being back in grade school, but I have bragging rights this years party) I do feel bad for the little girl involved, but not much I can do about it.

Story Break:

Pretty much every year I throw a Halloween party. This year no exception. Rosie hands out invites to her entire grade as well as our friends and families. A lot of people, you'd think, however we only get about a turn out of 30, including adults, so really it's not that bad. I also get the "done good" feeling knowing that no child was left out!

This year was no exception, we planned it handed out the invitations, and later on that week another girl in the grade, someone who my daughter thought was a friend, handed out invites for the same night! My daughter was so worried. I reminded her that most her friends had been to several parties of ours and they always said they had fun. I told her not to stress too much about it, things always have a way of working out.

Night of the parties, most of Rosie's friends showed up! We had about 24 kids outside our family and we had a blast. The other little girl had nobody from school show up. (A couple other factors she lives outside school boundaries and hadn't invited as many friends.)

6. I want to do community theatre one day. I love acting, but with my kids can't commit much to a play. One day, I'll fulfill this dream! I may end up being the granny, instead of the young girl, but I still steal the show.

7. I am a cheap-o. I have a gift to find the clearance items, the sale items. I should run my own TV show, but then I'd have more competition. I have spent $300 dollars on Christmas this year and you'll be surprised. I found some gifts for 10 cents! I will give you a tip. Start looking in January.

8. Last but not least. I am an ice cream alcoholic. Not only do I love ice cream, I really enjoy eating it. My parents have several videos of me in younger years, with almost a seduction look in my eyes as I am eating ice cream. I still get that way sometimes, but I avoid cameras now!

Beggars can be choosers!

I went to Wendy's for lunch today.

As I was leaving (mind you I am driving an old min-van with my windows rolled up) this guy came and approached my van. I had to stop due to traffic, and he tapped on my window. I tried to ignore him, having seen him use this same aggressive approach with the previous vehicle. I cracked my window.....

"Ma'am, (I hate that) do you have an extra sandwich I can I have, I'm starving!"

"Seriously?" I asked him.

I shook my head no, considering the only thing I had gotten was some chili and fries. I rolled up my window and was looking at inching my way into traffic. This guy kicked my van and hit my window! I couldn't believe it.

Luckily there was a police officer that witnessed this incident and came over. Hopefully he'll get his free meal in jail today, if they keep him.

I get irritated with people begging. The country we live in is a generous one. There are plenty of places to go to get help, people just won't do it. I know it hurts the ego a little, but sometimes in order to give charitably we need to also be able to receive charity. I think also people don't go, because the are afraid they might get help out what ever situation they are in, and generally people like this guy are afraid of honest day-to-day living.

I really dislike the term hand outs. I like term hand up. Being a single mom and a starving student, I know what it's like to feel and be desolate. There was a time in my youth, where I lived on the streets, but it was my choice; I had other options, but I didn't want them.

I am so appreciative to the state organizations, non-profit institutions, parents, family, and friends that taught me how I can be self-supporting on my own. I still struggle, but I am proud that I know can afford to stop by Wendy's for a meal now and then.

Give a man a fish and he eats for a day, Teach a man to fish and he eats all year.

Bad Hair Day

These pictures totally do not do justice, but check out the do! Olivia definitely had a bad hair day. (I promise that it wasn't like this when we left this morning!)

All my girls! I had to take pictures of all of them........Rose didn't want to.....Mom won!

Miss Sabrina!

Late night post???

I know, pretty bizarre for even me.

I up frying cornbread, or maybe I should say burning cornbread. Whenever I make cornbread, I burn it. It's a given. Just like whenever I fry hamburger I burn it. Oh well I say....but it's a little embarrassing to take a burnt cornbread stuffing to the work potluck....I have figured out the trick, I just peel the burnt layer off, because it's stuffing, nobody will know right?

Just me and my blogging community....and I KNOW I can trust you all RIGHT?

I was in discussion about parenting techniques with Johnathan tonight. I am not perfect at all at parenting, but after five kiddos, dozen of different parenting classes (Love and Logic, 123 Magic, Step Families, and more)
I have learned a thing or to.

Tonight I learned something.

Amazing, eh? (I'm still a little Canadian y'all!)

We were talking about approaches and Johnathan a nice guy and all, but he isn't very receptive to my piles of books and literature I have received from dozen of classes. I look at it all and it is overwhelming, but soooo wonderful.

He asked about what was in the scriptures. I looked at him. Then I thought of Christ. Christ spent his whole life teaching. That's what he did, taught through sermons and through parables. There was only one time he really ever was angry. He taught by example and through his love for our Heavenly Father.

I took a step back. I even pulled out the bible and did some reading in the New Testament. I found a parable to help with an issue that I am having for my daughter, I mean word for word! I pray that she will understand the message through it.

It's funny how revelations hit you like a ton of bricks. Duh! Here I have been sitting with probably the best instruction manual for parenting, and yet I never thought of it that way.

I hope that I can start to model my parenting skills after the Savior.

My first goal, remember baby steps:

I want to teach and be heard, not yell to be heard.

Another funny story from long ago....

My sister and I were truly city girls.

We spent a year living in Provo, Utah. Where we lived it was on the outskirts of town and we had several farm animals housed around us.

Really the only animals that we had been exposed to were cats.

We had a horse bordering our backyard.

Being curious we wanted to know the sex of the horse.

Remember we were city gals, only use to looking at kitties for the sex.

So I talked my sister into lifting up the tail of the horse with a stick to check the sex and her reply......

"Poop!"

Disappointed, we later learned that to tell a sex of the horse really doesn't have the need for any lifting..........................

Misconceptions?

I have learned when I have blogger block, to read my friends and family's blogs to open my mind. Reading about the musings of my nephew Kai, inspired me to share some musings of my own sweet children......

How to do Arithmetic and Not to Cheat....according to Matthew

I am always on the go, so we do a lot of homework practice in the car. I'd say what's 3+4 and the kids would shout back an answer. Andrew was in kindergarten, Matthew first grade and Rosie was in third.

Andrew was very good at getting the answers. I now know why...

Matthew, "Andrew cheating! No fare."

Me. "How is he cheating?"

Matthew, "He's counting on his fingers, and that's cheating."

Me," Sweetie that's the way that you learn how to add in your head; How do you do it?"

Matthew,"Well, at school I just look over on the person's next to me, and copy what they have."

(Me. A little too stump to answer for a while.......)

I of coursed pulled him aside and hopefully explained the whole cheating concept clearer........

Turkey Day....

So, I hate the concept of Thanksgiving Day.

I like being grateful and giving thanks, but the ceremonial garbage, I never really like.

I enjoyed BTT (Before the twins) days. The kids would go to their dads, I could hibernate all day and night. I never went shopping on black Friday...we didn't have that in Canada...we had boxing day, until last year. I hated it, however I am still drawn to go this year. I am not sure why. Perhaps it's more for entertainment purposes, rather then to get any shopping done. I hate lines, I hate going to a store, to find out 199 before me bought what I was looking for, but I find it comical to see the shoppers endure this torture. Maybe just maybe, I'll be amidst them....or I'll take another roll in my comforter and disconnect the alarm!

Back to turkey day...

I really don't like cooking much; nor do like eating to the point of bursting at the sides, only to pretend I have room for dessert.

However I love my grandma's recipe for stuffing. That is all I really like about this time of year. I could make it other times, but it wouldn't be such a novelty to me.

The other day, just being polite, I asked Johnathan's sister-in-law if she needed help with Thanksgiving. She immediately was thankful, because she just found out she had to work, and she's the one that normally does this.

Did I mention I HATE cooking??????????

I hope Johnathan knows that I truly do care about him and his family, because I wouldn't do this for just anyone.

I think I got this meal down....put I need a good yam recipe....I hate the canned ones, and I can never tell when the yam is done.......I've never actually made the marshmallow topping, so if anyone has a good EASY recipe (preferred crock pot one) that they have done, please let me know.

At least the guys got this deep fryer thing for the turkey....I guess there's talk of one for the oven too,

Menu:

10 cans of olives, veggie tray, turnip greens, corn/peas, cranberries (not from a can), stuffing (grandma's), spinach dip, mashed potatoes, gravy, yams (hopefully if they turn out.)

Anything missing???????????????

Saturday the girls and I, and Randy our new neighbor boy went to the Living Aquarium in South Jordan. http://www.thelivingplanet.com/ It not the best aquarium, however it is the twins favorite place to go. This visit we went to their show on rain forests and met some interesting creatures of the amazons.............snakes, parrots, spiders, scorpions (that glowed under black light) and one of the twins favorites:

A Madagascar hissing cockroaches.........Don't worry Nancy we WILL NOT ever get one as a pet. I read that it is high fashion jewelry now............http://www.luxist.com/2006/04/15/giant-madagascar-hissing-cockroach-brooch/

The girls favorite part is the interactive pond they have. I think they just like the water, because it's way too deep for them to touch anything, but hey what kids wouldn't?

The twins and I.....

Rose and the twins........

Trying to touch the sting-rays.

Mom, I can't reach......

Come here boy, come here! Over all we had fun! We are taking the boys next weekend. (For mums in Utah it is soooo inexpensive! Under 2 is free, and for a year's membership it is $9.00 for under 18 & $15 dollars for adults!)

Black and blue nose....

I love this picture of Olivia. This doesn't do her injury justice, but it's cute. I picked her up from daycare and a younger baby had just thrown a toy at her nose! It made a cut by her eye and her nose swell and turn black and blue. Poor baby!

RoseMarie

I have decided to dedicate my Friday posts to one of my children.

RoseMarie is 11 years old, almost 12! She is not only my biggest helpers, but one of my best friends!

I remember when she was born....I was so young then! She didn't want to leave me, she spent an extra 15 days past her due date! Then I had 3 days of labor with her. When she was born, the doctor told me that I didn't have a newborn, I had a one month old baby! She looked like a porcelain doll.

Rosie was so quick to learn everything growing up. She rolled over early, talked early, crawled early! She never did anything she didn't know how to.

I remember her being able to crawl to the top of the stairs and she would just sit and watch, never attempting to go down. Then one day she went down! I never had to worry about things being flushed down the toilet or my house decorated with toilet paper, she never got into things like that.

She wasn't even two and we would have sentence like conversations. I remember she caught me crying one time, she was about 20 months, and she stroked my head and said, "It's okay mommy, I'm here now." That made me cry even more!

After her first brother was born I thought she was the sweetest big sister! She was so sweet and gentle with him, while I was watching! I asked her father (David) to watch the two children...Rosie almost 2 and Matthew not even a month old, while I took a shower. I got out of the shower and checked the living room, no Matthew! I asked David where he was, without looking from his computer answered, "In the living room." I went and checked again...no Matthew! By this time I am worried, my heart is pounding, and I am checking the door, locked, the window, locked! "David, HE"S GONE!" I scream. He gets up, he thinks I hid him, because I always tell him that he never watches the kids, finally he realizes I am serious.

I mean where could a 1 month old be? We lived in a 2-bedroom, 5 room apartment, but no sign of him. We search every room but Rosie's. I am standing in the hall and I happen out of the corner of my eye see a little foot fly up behind the kitchen set. I move the kitchen set and there is Matthew, squashed between the wall and the kitchen set, but safe and sound!

How did a child who is not quite 2, manage to get her 1 month old brother there?

I found this out about a week later, while I was talking to my mother on the phone. I had my back momentarily turned from the two children. I turned around to see Rosie take Matthew by the ankles and start to drag him from his blanket.

Since that incident, she has accepted the fact that she has siblings and loves them dearly. After the to boys, she would pray every night that she would get a sister. I tell her that she must have been really good, because she wound up with two sisters!

Since the twins birth she has been a second mother to them. I couldn't ask for a better daughter.

I save some more stories about Rosie for another Friday.......I actually have WORK to do!

Sinuses and Sabrina

Sabrina was such a little trooper yesterday! We started off meeting with the allergist in the morning. I wish I could have taken a picture of her back. It was quite interesting. They scratched her back with several things to test her reaction to them. It was funny, because it didn't hurt her, just itched and she was trying to be so patient and not scratch! She developed an itchy dance, it was so cute. Unfortunately everything happened kind of quickly and I didn't take any pictures.

After the results were in, (She's allergic to Lindon trees, Mulberry Trees, Mesquite Trees and a type of dust mite) the doctor sent us up to Primary Hospital for more tests.

See, Sabrina has an excessive about of fluids in her sinuses and it is quite concerning for the doctors. They want to know why, and quite frankly so do I! They are more then likely going to have to do surgery to drain her sinuses, but they are afraid if they don't find the cause, they'll end up having to do surgery again.

If you look closely you can see the blue bags under her eyes. This is bruising caused by sinus pressure.
The purple bandages around her arms are holding gauze in place for a sweat test. The sweat test is to check her sodium levels in her sweat, used to diagnose Cystic Fibrosis.

Sabrina wanted a picture of her wrist band, see my horrible nails, needing to be filled?

We are so blessed here in Utah to have a wonderful hospital like Primary Children's. They have been so good to my family. They are great for children! Sabrina wanted a picture of the birds.

This was Sabrina's biggest owie of the day! She was so brave when they drew her blood!

Please keep her in your hearts and prayers, while we hope for an answer soon!

Toddler Dialogue

Coming in to work this morning I was able to hear a dialogue between the twins.

Sabrina sneezed, "Achoo."

Olivia, "Not Achoo, AWWWWCHOOOO!"

Sabrina, "AWWWWCHOOOOO?"

Olivia, "No AWWWWWWWWWCHOOOOOO!"

Sabrina, "Kay AWWWWWWWWWWWWWCHOOOOOOOOOO!"

It went on like this for about ten minutes.

I love my drives, most of the time, with the twins. They are at that cute stage where they make up songs, communicate back and forth. What a blessing it is to be able to spend the time with them and watch them grow up!

FYI

Just a quick note, for those who want to know. I am starting another blog in addition to this one. I am a little scared about it, because I am telling my story. It will contain secrets about my life, and eventually pieces will be become a book. I don't want to hurt anyone, but it's time for me to get it off my chest. I know that I am not alone with what has happened to me. I will not be posting a link to this, but you can access it through my profile listings. I love you all, and thank you for being my family and friends online and those who know me offline.

A Mother's Strength

I thought I'd post my full poem I wrote

A Mother's Strength

A tired head laid down to rest
Overwhelmed was the stress.
No one could see; the tears on her cheek.
Amidst all the winter bustle and cheer
She stood all alone, no one could hear.
Worries falling with each tear,
Trembled down the sadden face.
How could life come to such place?
Full of pain and such sorrow-
Was there hope in tomorrow?
A disapproval from every eye,
Made her stifle a humble cry.
No matter what her reach,
Or what was in her dreams,
Life threw her to her knees.
Could the heavens hear her plea?
Cloudy were the skies
Could the pray squeeze by?
The bustle and fuss grew still.

Mother, I can see,
How heavy your heart is hung.
Troubles do upset you,
As strong as you be.
I place my hand in yours,
So that both of us can feel.
Alone we felt a chill,
United strengthen warms.
I know that I am young,
But by you I came to be.
Regardless of our ways ago,
Or where we may wind up.
Your life's turmoils long and hard,
Will help my soul to grow.

Quirks.....tagged by my sister......

My sister, Nancy http://www.heissatopia.com/2008/11/new-quirks.html tagged me with listing 8 quirks about myself.

1) It really bugs when someone says or asks a obvious question. Like when I'm in the middle of cleaning the kitchen and someone walks in and states the kitchen needs to be clean.....really? Thanks for letting me know. Or when I am holding a diaper and the wipes, trying to convince a two-year-old to lie down and get her bum changed and someone says.....Olivia/Sabrina needs a diaper change...........


2) It bugs me when people see the negative in things and starts their stories with.....Someone did this to me. I guess I feel that we always have some part in everything. I am not perfect yet in this, but I try.

3) I have to have my closet organized by dresses, skirts, long sleeve blouses, short sleeve, tank tops, dress pants.

4) My movies have to all face the same order.....with 2-yr old twins....I can go nuts....

5) When I wear boots, my socks usually don't match...... shhhh.....that's a secret!

6) I seldom brush my hair.

7) I have to take a shower every morning or else I am dazed the whole day.

8) I love peanut butter on a spoon dipped in sugar. I did this growing up and recently found out my grandma does the same thing!

I now tag......mmmmmmm.......Andrew (Nancy's Hubby), Kym, Arrika, Maryanne, David, Shannon, Rosa, and Mary.

Moving and pain

It was a busy weekend for us.

I moved some of my stuff out of the Salt Lake home into the Herriman home, I'll blog about what I'm going through when I can, there's legal issues pending.

I have fibromyalgia. All the moving boxes from one location to the next, by the third load, I could barely drive. Johnathan is such a dear sweetheart.

I loaded the last thing into van, for the third load of the day. I was tired, and feeling a tad sore from the task at hand. I got into my seat and started the journey to our new home in Herriman. My arms began to go numb and my body melted like weights in the seat.

As I turned each turn toward my new destination my arms and my body cringed in pain. It was as if every pressure point in my body was being pinched to the point of torture. I was trying hard not to cry and still reach the finish line.

I made into the driveway, and parked the van. I rested my head on the wheel. Johnathan arrived home sometime after my arrival and helped me out of the van and into the truck. After a hard long day welding a warehouse, he drove me to the emergency room.

He held my hand when the doctor poked at my points of torturous pain. He distracted me while I received an injection of relief.

He doesn't know how my pain feels, but he eases it by showing he's trying to care. I am so glad we found each other.

Thanks to friends who took the twins an extra night, it helped so much!

(Just a side note, the injection is a wonder drug called Toradol http://www.rxlist.com/toradol-drug.htm)

Ear Aches and Stuffy Noses

As some of you know, Sabrina is a child who has suffered endless ear infections and stuffy noses. She had tubes put in just before her 1st birthday. She has puffiness under eyes from sinus fluids and just has struggled when it comes to colds.

She has one more month to improve or the doctor will have to drain her sinuses for her and at the time he'll also remove her adenoids. We are trying her on a nasal spray for this next month and also sending her to an allergist.

Please keep her in your prays, so much for her at this young age! She knows doctor offices too well. She sits so good for the doctor to look into her ears, nose and throat; she doesn't even cry!
After its all done she patiently waits by the nurse's station to receive her sucker and sticker. What a little trooper I have!

She got bored waiting for the doctor so she started coloring a cup I found.

What a good artist....this is a face!

A poem

So every once in a while I check my name against various search engines and make sure no slanderish things show up.

I found a website, that I sumbitted poetry to years ago. I have two copywrighted poems there. Thought I'd share the link with you:

http://www.poetry.com/dotnet/P6453057/999/1/display.aspx

This one is a Mother's strength. I had to edit it for the contest I'll put the full one on another time.

Thank you MOM

I was wondering why no one was commenting on my posts. I was begining to think that it was ME! Thanks mom for emailling me and telling me that you couldn't post. I switched my layout and it tweaked the comment thingy. I believe I have fixed it now!

Christina

In following both my sisters, I think reflections on Fridays is a good thing. I decided to dedicate the next six Friday's to each of my children.

When I first met Christina I didn't know she would wind up being one of my children. I am so grateful she is, because she is so smart and loving and a great big sister to all my children, especially Rosie.

I started babysitting Christina when she was three years old. She was so smart even then! She loved it when I would come over and spent many times snuggling on my lap. The most vivid thing I remember about her was the fact she HATED going to bed.

She would scream at the top of her lungs for hours, if I let her. She only did that for the first weeks or so. I became one of the sitters that she didn't exhibit that behavior for.

As she grew up I co-coached her soccer team. She was a great team player!

When she was seven, her and Asheli would come over and babysit my three younger children. She was so good to them.

I remember that she had this business pant suit, just like the executives wear. She loved to wear it to school! She was always very mature for her age and a great helper.

She always did what I asked her to, and was quick to inform if the other siblings were not following instructions.

Now that she is in high school, she is above a 3.5 grade point average. She is planning to get her CNA certification and eventually her nursing degree.

When she comes and visits on weekends, the twins light up to see her and Rosie is very excited. She is such a great help with the girls and boys. They look up to her.

I am so glad that she is a part of our family now!

Pincess? Eyesceem?

"Who are you?" I ask Olivia.

"Pincess!" she replys without hesitation.

Yesterday was payday, and on paydays I usually pick up fast food for dinner. During the warmer times sometimes, okay a lot of the times on the way home for work we'd swing by Arctic Circle to pick up an icecream cone. (Here they give kiddos the courtesy cones for free!)

I guess I've done it too much. Last night at Wendy's drivethru I tried to place an order.

"Olivia, hamburger or chicken?"

"Eyesceem"

"Okay after eyesceem, hamburger or chicken?"

"Eyesceem"

"Fine, hamburger it is."

"Oranges or Frenchfries?"

"Eyesceem!"

Much to by surprise, Miss Bina chimes out:

"FunchFries!"

We had a laugh or two.........

Crazy girl, my Bina

Sabrina (Bina)........

Rosie wanted to make sure I told everyone about Sabrina.

Sabrina is pretty comical at times. We did our good night snuggles and she was sent off to bed with promises of wearing her new light up shirt.........

Rosie notice that she turned into the bathroom, instead of her room.

She followed only to find Sabrina head first into the toilet!

I wished I would have taken a picture..............

The girls and I have compromised. If they'll go to sleep, they can sleep where every they want in their room.

Believe it or not her favorite spot is the toy box. This picture was shot this morning. She also insisted on wearing her Halloween costume. Crazy girl.........

I felt like I should post this.....

I know total blog overkill, but something told me someone needs this. I found this story and used in a Thanksgiving talk I gave at church.........

Thanksgiving Special

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her Birkenstocks as she pushed against a November gust and the florist shop door. Her life had been easy, like spring breeze. Then in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a minor automobile accident stole her ease. During this Thanksgiving week she would have delivered a son. She grieved over her loss. As if that weren't enough, her husband's company threatened a transfer. Then her sister, whose holiday visit she coveted, called saying she could not come.

What's worse, Sandra's friend infuriated her by suggesting her grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. "She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra with a shudder. Thanksgiving? Thankful for what? She wondered. For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an air bag that saved her life but took that of her child?

"Good afternoon, may I help you?" The shop clerk's approach startled her. "I....I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra.

"For Thanksgiving? Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the Thanksgiving "Special?" asked the shop clerk. "I'm convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued. "Are you looking for something that conveys 'gratitude' this Thanksgiving?"

"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong." Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the shop clerk said, "I have the perfect arrangement for you."

Then the door's small bell rang, and the shop clerk said, "Hi, Barbara...let me get your order."She politely excused herself and walked toward a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and long-stemmed thorny roses; Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped: there were no flowers."Want this in a box?" asked the clerk.

Sandra watched for the customer's response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed.

"Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. "You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again," she said as she gently tapped her chest. "Uh," stammered Sandra, "that lady just left with, uh....she just left with no flowers!"

"Right, said the clerk, "I cut off the flowers. That's the Special. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet."

"Oh, come on, you can't tell me someone is willing to pay for that!" exclaimed Sandra.

"Barbara came into the shop three years ago feeling much like you feel today," explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had lost her father to cancer, the family business was failing, her son was into drugs, and she was facing major surgery." "That same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk, "and for the first time in my life, had just spent the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too great a debt to allow any travel."

"So what did you do?" asked Sandra. "I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly. "I've always thanked God for good things in life and never to ask Him why those good things happened to me, but when bad stuff hit, did I ever ask! It took time for me to learn that dark times are important. I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of life, but it took thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort. You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others."

Sandra sucked in her breath as she thought about the very thing her friend had tried to tell her. "I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God."

Just then someone else walked in the shop. "Hey, Phil!" shouted the clerk to the balding, rotund man. "My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement...twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems," laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue-wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind me asking why she wants something that looks like that?" "No...I'm glad you asked," Phil replied. "Four years ago my wife and I nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we slogged through problem after problem. He rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she learned from "thorny" times, and that was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific "problem" and give thanks for what that problem taught us." As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special.

"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life," Sandra said to the clerk. "It's all too...fresh." "Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that thorns make roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember, it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns."

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on resentment. "I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out.

"I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute." "Thank you.

What do I owe you?" Sarah asked.

"Nothing; nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me." The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra. "I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first."

It read: "My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the life I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant." Praise Him for your roses, thank him for your thorns.

Author Unknown

Just a side note.........

I wonder how Susan B. Anthony........she was Arrested for voting back in 1872.......would feel to know that we woman now CAN vote and that a black male citizen was elected for president?

My Ramblings The Day After..........

Yesterday I utilized my right to vote. I among my closest friends was really the only one that did. I know politics are not the most interesting of all the topics, however I choose to be somewhat informed.

I can say today I a proud to have voted for the first black American President. I feel honored to be able to witness this event.

My daughter Rosie, was about four years old, and being raised in Utah, she hadn't seen many black people. We moved into a new ward and in her class there was a little black girl. I didn't notice anything, until when we got home from church, my daughter asked me if it was okay that "girl's name" was her friend. I told of course, why couldn't she be her friend? She told because her skin was brown.

I told her that we all have different skin colors, but when we bleed we all bleed red.

This morning my daughter made a point of bringing up that saying. How awesome was this election? My daughter has never known segregation, has more Hispanic friends than not, has a teacher that encourages culture and learning knew languages. She witnessed the first women to try and win for president, and the election of the first black American president.

Change is good.

I also learned that over 90% of the promises politicians make, are followed through.....they just get a bad rap.

There are American Americans, you all know someone who is like that. Closed minded, arrogant fools that think the world is theirs and only theirs. They see only the red, white and blue, and believe that everyone should too.

What's funny is that they have forgotten. They have forgotten where most have come from. They don't realize how functional the rest of the world is.

I read a lot. My favorite fictional books are historical fiction. I read stories about people's lives, how it was to live through slavery, immigration, holocaust, and what not.

Stories about women who wanted the right to vote, and were denied time after time. Then they could vote, only if they had a property deed with their name on it! Yet there are women today that say who cares?

It is a matter of the lessor of two evils..............but at least we have a choice.

That's what our fore-fathers fought for, the right to chose our government, not live under dictatorship. We can speak our minds and wear what we want. We have the freedom to be what we want to be, live where we want to live, do what we want to do.

I'm sad that no one I know seems to care......

Most of us look forward to the day that we get our Driver Licenses. We enjoy that privilege, but how many look forward to being able to take part in choosing who runs our cities, counties, governments, or country? That to is a privilege that not everyone gets.

I laugh at the "American Americans". The immigrants I know from Hispanic descent, are honored when they can vote. The projection is that more and more Hispanic US citizens will be here in US. How much of an influence will that have on our government? They realize the importance of voting, and what an honor it is to be "American".

I am proud to live here in United States, where I have water daily (sorry Nancy), where my kids have a chance to go to college, even when I can't pay their way, where I can vent freely about my views on the government, where I can search freely on the Internet, (China is censored).

I love Canada too, and hope one day that the US will have a medical program similar........I lived both places, and am from both places..........

I am rambling a bunch of thoughts.

But I'll close with this:

"Knowledge is only blocked by Ignorance"

Something cute from the past

I am kind of treating my blog as an online diary, so I have somethings I will write that are "note" worthy for my children to read when they are older.

I really enjoy children between the ages of 4-6. Especially when they are talkative. At this age they say open and honest thoughts and opinions.

I think every family has one child that you wished you had a ongoing tape recorder so you don't miss anything. Among my siblings I believe this child was Patrick. So far with my children, this child was Andrew.

I remember after having, yet another ultrasound with the twins, photocopying various pictures the doctor took for me. I put about six on the page, and made one for Rosie, Matthew and Andrew. Andrew was in kindergarten and was 5 years old. I handed each child the page with the pictures on it. I was far enough along that you could see a hand, foot, arm, head, face profile, and even on one picture it showed a foot kicking the other one's bum.

Andrew pondered on his pictures for a minute. Then proclaimed, "That's why it takes so long!" I asked him what he meant by that. He replied, "It takes so long to have babies, cause God's got to put all the pieces together!"

I love that age...........

M.I.A. (a mother's worse fear)

Okay so I'm going on blog overkill today, but I wanted to blog on my missing child story, in response to my mom's posting on her blog. (Also I feel guilty about not blogging this weekend)

Matthew was in Kindergarten, Rosie in first grade, and Andrew in preschool. This was BTT (before the twins).

I was out running errands and knew I had to be home by a certain time to meet Matthew's kindergarten bus. I rushed home and got there about the same time the bus should have been pulling up. I waited and waited. Rosie got home, still no Matthew. Andrew got home, still no Matthew. I called the school, by now it was about 20 minutes after he should have been home. The school informed me that the buses had all gone home and he should have been dropped off already. I started checking around in the house. Checking all mounds of blankets, in toy baskets thinking he might have fallen asleep somewhere? My phone rang and it was the bus driver informing me that Matthew had been dropped off about a half hour EARLIER then he was suppose to be, because a lot of children were absent that day. Matthew was MIA for about an hour.

I prayed like my mother and father taught me. No answer. I called my grandma, and after talking to her, hung up and was ready to call the police. Just as I dialed 9-1-1-, my other line rang. I answered it. It was the school. Matthew was at another house about 10 blocks down the street.

(Matthew had some learning struggles and was in a special school that was attached to an elementary school)

I drove down to where the school had said he was at, and found him with a kind lady who had a bunch of kids of her own.

Matthew had been dropped off at our house. Seeing nobody was home, he figured he would walk to daycare. Both were on 500 east in SLC, our house was about 1500 South, daycare was about 3400 south. He had made it past 2400 South. Then a bus driver spotted him walking and thought he was a little young to be out by himself. She stopped the bus and knocked on the lady's house because she had a bunch of kids, and figured he'd be safe. The lady searched through Matthew's backpack and found papers from the elementary school that was attached to his school.

What took so long was that the school didn't have Matthew registered as a student, so they had no clue who he was.

Thankfully the connection was made and he was safe and sound!

November 1st, we were able to attend Johnathan's niece's wedding. Boy did she luck out! It was gorgeous weather that day. The ceremony was held at Sugarhouse park, here in Salt Lake City.

Her brothers and brother-in-laws enjoyed trashing their truck during the celebration dinner.
Annie made a beautiful bride; her face was glowing! I hope they have a beautiful life together.

Trick or Treat

Happy Halloween from my goblins to yours!

Sabrina wanted no part in posing for the pre trick or treating photo op! I can't get over Rosie's costume this year. Can that creepy thing be my daughter? BTW the twins are butterflies.Okay enough with these pictures, seriously where's the candy?Sabrina on the go as usual! Mom I am outta here!If you can look closely, Olivia is trying to hands on some of the decorations. It took us over an hour to do one block! Each house one of the twins were trying to touch the decorations. Rosie floating by!
Twins were busily eating some scones at this house. They were made to order, and just what we needed. Yum!
This is Sabrina and Rosie walking to another house.

The twins at first were skeptical about knocking on doors. The sad thing is by the time they caught on, Rose and I had enough! They have enjoyed the last couple of days eating candy. I put the candy up high, I thought. Johnathan swears that they have a hidden stash somewhere in the house. It seems every time we look at them they have a piece of candy. I am not sure where they get it from, unless they have a secret stash........

(OH if you have trouble distinguishing the twins, Olivia has the purple bag and Sabrina the green one.)

Reflections

Okay, I haven't been posting as much, but I have been sooo busy. I also have been fighting of a horrific sinus infection!

This is a picture taken from the backyard of the Herriman place. In the early mornings and later in the evenings I like to watch deer families frolic through this field. I have gotten so close that I could almost touch the deer.

This picture is of a sunrise I saw coming to work on Halloween day. It was so beautiful, yet eery...A perfect Halloween morning!