I how I Feel Right Now.........

Emotions...............not Physically

I have a new car, with a CD player, and put in an old Christmas CD in it. My Dad made it for me years ago. I love Christmas music. I love Christmas Lights. I love the Christmas Season. I could do without Christmas Day.

I love giving, I love the atmosphere, but the actual day....

I am thinking next year, when my life is more together.....HA! Like this'll ever happen, I want to do the 12 days of Christmas. That way Christmas day we can focus just on family and the Christ part.

As soon as the twins are old enough, I want to go and volunteer our time doing a service project as a whole family.

I want to spend more time with my family. Life can change so quickly, and I don't ever want my kids to say Grandpa Who?

I really need to get a web cam and Skypee, so I can stay in touch with my sisters more, and our kids can know each other.

Growing up I loved knowing everyone. I knew my mom's cousins, their kids, etc. I loved that. I loved having cousins around, and truly knowing them.

When did life became so complicated? I remember not to long ago, life was fun.

I'm not saying there aren't any fun moments, but I could do without the traffic, text messages, emails, inpersonalizations. I miss getting hand written letters in the mail. I've saved pretty much all of them! Nancy's, David's, Abra's, Josie's even Erica's books she send. I have notes from Grandmas, Aunts, and anyone who thought so kind to write.

This year, I pulled the last five years worth of Christmas cards out. I have the last one from Grandma Conrad. I cry a little every year I've pulled it out.

Life still goes on. I have work to do today. I house to put away tomorrow.........